GRAPHICS SOUND CONTROL FRUSTRATION FUN FACTOR OVERALL

NES Action/Platformer 1 Player No save feature When I saw this game at K-Mart for a buck, I couldn't resist buying it. I remembered it always being on the show Nick Arcade when I was in elementary school, and the memories of the funny little man with the long red hair whipping baddies to death was more than enough to convince me to pick it up. I came home, popped it in, and proceeded to die repeatedly on the first level. I grew frustrated. I checked online and saw that many people hailed it as one of the toughest games on the system, perhaps even too tough to be an enjoyable game. I put it down for a week, came back to it, and obliterated it. Kabuki Quantum Fighter isn't all that hard of a game, people just don't give it a chance. The story goes something like this: Colonel Scott has to enter a supercomputer to stop a virus from spreading terror throughout the universe. The technology that allows him to enter the supercomputer is not fully developed, so no one knows what will become of the colonel once he is inside. If you didn't guess by the title of the game, the colonel becomes a kabuki, or japanese dancer. His main weapon is his long red hair, which he whips at enemies in a headbanging fashion. There are also five special weapons that he'll gain along the way, one after completing each stage. Some stages are made up of more than one section, and some are not. Every stage has some sort of boss at the end, and the final stage is just the final boss battle (which isn't too tough, by the way). Perhaps the reason that people find this game to be so difficult is the fact that many of the jumps need to be performed with split second timing (particularly in the third stage). One wrong move can send you plummeting to the bottom of a shaft, possibly into a pit of fire or lava, and that's never fun. Luckily, you're able to stockpile a ton of life and chip power (which is used up when you use a special weapon), so dying isn't usually a problem. A major problem is the timer. There is one stage in particular where you have about 45 seconds to rush down a zig-zagging tower of sorts, and that's okay. But when the timer forces you to rush through almost every single level, it's inexcusable. Aside from those obstacles, the enemies don't really pose much a threat to you. There are only a handful of different types, and they always follow the same basic patterns. Most are rather agile, however, and can get in a few shots while you're trying to headbang them into oblivion. Graphics: The graphics are great. Everything is easily distinguishable, and many of the backgrounds are animated in some way or another. The Quantum Fighter himself is animated only adequately, however. Jumping only uses one frame, which makes it look awkward. Punching (which is only done when crouching) uses way too many frames of animation, and seems to be more sluggish than it should be. There isn't any slowdown, which is surprising (especially on a few of the bosses, where the screen can be quite cluttered). Hal did a very good job in the graphics department, indeed. Sound & Music: I absolutely love the soundtrack in this game. The tunes are upbeat and have a techno feel to them. They give you a sense of urgency throughout the game; it's almost as if the world really is going to end unless you destroy the virus. The sound effects are only decent, with a swooshing sound for your hair attack, and each of the special weapons having one of their own. Other than that, sounds are fairly sparse, which is a shame. Gameplay: The cutscenes in between levels are poorly-translated pieces of garbage that serve no purpose whatsoever than to annoy the player (well, annoyance is all they provided me with). They don't add anything to the game whatsoever. Controls are great once you get used to them. If you're willing to adjust to the colonel's odd jumping physics, you'll have it figured out in no time. Boss battles always provide a challenge, but are fairly easy if you managed to stockpile up on life and chip power. It's very playable, and there are moments of pure platforming bliss, also. Gotta love that. Replay Value: The only reason I go back to play this game is to see how fast I can beat it (I'm closing in on the 20-minute mark as we speak). Once you beat it, there's really nothing left to do... no secrets, no ticky, no shirty, no nothing. Boo. Nostalgia Value: Like I said in the opening, this game was all over Nickelodeon when I was a kid, and so it of course stuck in my head all these years. The idea of whipping enemies with your hair was so different to me that I had to play the game. Unfortunately, I could never find it anywhere. Now that I finally have (and beaten it), some of the nostalgia has worn off, but I'll never forget watching those sorry kids on Nick Arcade get their asses handed to them because they sucked so bad. Pure joy, I tell you, pure joy. Learning Curve: This is tough for me to grade. If you stick with the game, you'll learn it. It just takes time. Unfortunately, most people won't stick with it, and they'll become frustrated. Learning to swing from bar to bar can be difficult, but the first few levels give you adequate room to play around. The levels do get progressively harder, as do the bosses. The final boss was kind of a let-down, but he does take some patience and skill to defeat. ......BOTTOM LINE: Kabuki Quantum Fighter isn't a game that will be enjoyed by everyone. Jumping takes some getting used to, as does the concept of whipping enemies with your hair. The ideas presented therein are very innovative, and it's a shame that the sequel promised after the credits never saw the light of day. If you give this game a chance, it's guaranteed to provide a challenging (yet fun) experience. -FlowingMindspin